Player Experience - Fall 2004

Completely Inappropriate Section, Beavis & Butthead Style:

• “Play women doubles in sand and grass.” – Vivian Lopez
  Heh heh… two women in the sand and grass… heh heh
  
  
• “Many other leagues, in many other places.” – Jeff Kapolka
  Heh heh…he has experience in many OTHER places… heh heh
  
  
• “I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that I do not wish to incriminate myself. But in my own defense I just have to say:  That thing with the purple panties... That wasn’t me. I swear it!” – Ron Thompson
  Whoa… that image was a buzzkill…
  
  
• “Teammates - you may experience dissatisfaction with life, along with a deep sense of melancholy.  I assume you’ve all had the chickenpox.  Do not be concerned if you arouse a few ticks from a Geiger counter.” – John Gartner
  Eww… hey Beavis, bring back those two women in the sand and grass… heh heh
  
  
• “ex pe ri ence  n.  The apprehension of an object, thought, or emotion through the senses or mind.  I have apprehended a volleyball, thought about it, and loved it.” – Evan Glickstein
  Heh heh… he said he loved his own ball… heh heh

Brutally Honest Section:

• “I’ve been playing so long, my first volleyball was a rock.” – Bill Epstein
  Yep... but when we get to Mr. Epstein's age, that's about the only thing that's like a rock...
  
  
• “No matter where you put me...I'm still gonna talk too much.” – Jim Conway
  How many guys are picturing their mother-in-law right about now?
  
  
• “Able to hit the ball - sometimes in the desired direction.” – Dan Hucker
  Well if you can get it right 1/3 of the time you can be a great baseball hitter...
  
  
• “Experienced, Flexible, and highly caffeinated!” – Micah Hoffman
  That explains the twitching...
  
  
• “Best attribute – punctuality” – Tina Whims
  Don't sell punctuality short... especially in this league!
  
  
•  “I'm saving $5 by registering early!  Mr. Lincoln could be going home with a certain league commissioner if my team gets some special treatment this year.  Wink, wink. Nudge, Nudge.  Everybody knows I can't get there on skill and talent alone…” – Paul Dethlefsen
  If I were Theresa, it would take alot more than a good word from Mr. Lincoln...
  
  
• “Regular Glory Days attendance for 6 seasons.  Consumed many hot wings and much Dominion Ale.” – Aaron Arnow
  Breakfast of Champions!!!
  

• “In the sequel, "Revenge of the Sith", this time the evil Darth Gillick resorted to abducting 3 of my warriors so that I would have to enter the battle undermanned.  We felt confident that we could still prevail, until we underestimated the power of his new apprentice, the sneakily evil Darth Woolley.  To fulfill the prophecy of bringing balance to the force, my goal next session is to steer the young impressionable Woolley away from the dark side. 
  
  In other developments, a new form of evil has arisen embodied in the bounty hunter Ronnie T. Fett.  Although he is currently weak in power and has yet to prove a threat to all that is good, his growing power will be closely monitored.” – Steve Butler
  These are extremely precient comments by Mr. Butler.  He wrote this before he knew he would be able to draft Matt Woolley from the Webmaster's team the previous season to own this season.  And about the incident with Ronnie T. later in the playoffs... it was all foreshadowed I guess.  Unfortunately for Mr. Butler, the Webmaster completed his trilogy of t-shirts.  Like Darth Vader said to Luke,"Who's your daddy!"  :-)
  

• “Born down in B-league, I found…
  The first bump I got was when I hit the ground;
  You end up like a ball that's been spiked too much;
  Till you spend half the match just catching up.
  
  Made it up to the BB jam;
  I get fat sets right by my hand;
  Sent me up to play the net;
  and when I pancake they just say "nice get".
  
  Born in the BSD, I was re-born in the BSD…” – Fred Robinson
  Damn... was going to come up with something witty, but instead I now have this burning desire to break out my Springteen CDs.  C-YA!